Baby

• Baby monkey: Wanna go play in the trees?
• Player: Maybe later - I can't right now.
• Baby monkey: Why not?
• Player: I can't climb and swing as well as you can.
• Baby monkey: You don't want to play in the trees with me?
• Player: Yes, I...
• Player: Who wants a banana?
• Baby monkey: Me! Me! I want a banana!
• Player: Phew, crisis averted.

Adult

Conversation 1

• Monkey: So why do you walk so funny all the time? Your knuckles barely even touch the ground.
• Player: I should hope they don't touch the ground at all!
• Monkey: Why, though? Is there something wrong with your back?
• Player: Yes, it's called good posture.
• Monkey: Ouch, sounds painful. I hope I don't catch it.
• Player: I don't think there's much chance of that...

Conversation 2

• Monkey: I want a banana!
• Player: 'I want', never gets.
• Monkey: Well, what DO I have to say to get a banana, then? What's the 'magic word'?
• Player: If I told you what the 'magic word' was, you'd just ask for a banana again.
• Monkey: Of course I would.
• Player: And that's why I'm not going to tell you.
• Monkey: Please tell me what the magic word is, pleaaaaase...
• Player: 'Pleaaaaase'.
• Monkey: Fine, don't tell me. Humph.

Conversation 3

• Monkey: Hey, you!
• Player: Who, me?
• Monkey: Yes, you!
• Player: What do you want?
• Monkey: Where did all your fur and tail go?
• Player: I was a bad little monkey that kept asking silly questions, so all my fur fell out and my tail dropped off.
• Monkey: Oh no! No wonder you're so mean and grumpy all the time.
• Player: Yes, I...
• Player: Hey!

Conversation 4

• Monkey: On Karamja.
• Player: Mighty Karamja.
• Monkey: Shaikahan eats, tonight.
• Player: On Karamja.
• Monkey: Mighty Karamja.
• Player: Shaikahan sleeps, tonight.
• Player: Woooooo, hoo hoooo hooooo, hey, Marimbo, hey.
• Monkey: Marimbo, hey. Marimbo, hey. Marimbo, hey. Marimbo, hey...

Conversation 5

On Ape Atoll, with the player transformed into a big zombie monkey

• Player: BRAAAAINS!
• Monkey: Argh! Stop it! That's not funny.
• Player: BRAAAAAAAAAAAINS!
• Monkey: Marimbo, save me!
• Player: OK, I'm sorry. I'll stop.
• Monkey: Just don't do that again; you'll give me bad dreams.
• Player: Aww, now I feel bad.

Conversation 6

On Ape Atoll with the player transformed into a bearded gorilla, karamjan monkey, medium ninja monkey, or blue faced gorilla

• Monkey: ...
• Player: ...
• Monkey: ...
• Player: What? Why are you looking at me like that?
• Monkey: Umm, how are you a mon-?
• Player: Do you honestly want to know?
• Monkey: All I want to know is if I will lose my fur and tail in a minute, due to us swapping species?
• Player: No.
• Monkey: Then I'm going to put this down to a bad banana flashback and say no more about it.